"To expect the unexpected shows a thoroughly modern intellect." - Oscar Wilde

Wednesday, 4 September 2019

Sweet Betrayals


A hard core sweet-toothist's biggest nightmare is to be let down by a promised helping of heaven. It could be a slice of the most decadent looking cake or a crispy yet succulent looking jalebi, that tastes totally contrary to its looks - a bite and miss kind of experience where the cake tastes like bread with stale icing and the jalebi tastes like thermocol dunked in syrup. Being annoyed would probably be stating the feeling it generates, rather optimistically. You wouldn't understand the feeling of utter betrayal when such injustice happens, if you aren't one yourself, I mean a sweet-toothist. 
I've often faced such let downs at lavish hotel buffets that boast an endless variety of desserts. 
A true-blooded sweet lover will begin his meal with desserts, ensuring he tries all of them. He doesn't believe in regional or international biases when it comes to desserts. Tiramisu, baklava, turkish delights, macaroons and souffles are at complete peace with gajar ka halwa, gulab jamuns, pethas, malai pedas, and phirnis
Post this sugar coma inducing appetizer, based on his stomach's capacity for expansion, he will manage to chuck in a few staples with daals, paneers and salads, to ensure a balanced diet. 
(Note: The use of masculine gender in this case may be slightly biased, the author being considerate and completely biased towards the fairer sex.)

Dainty pastries that taste like fluff, light melt-in-the-mouth souffles that are too eggy, halwas that are sugar, ghee and dry fruit deprived, luscious plump gulab jamuns with hard tasteless centers....well, I can keep tirade going, when I am thus stimulated by the atrocities of tasteless wonders and heartbreaking, two-timing sweet finales! In fact the sweet loving community would go to the extent of calling such offences, strikes below the belt, even the unkindest cut of all. And we are not even going down the path of sugar-free desserts, the term itself is an oxymoron.

Leaving behind starry hotels, back home, when the post dinner, "meethe me kya hai" question elicits a tray of cut fruits or raisins or...(shudder) a lump of jaggery, you know it is ghor kalyug.
C'est la vie, where bad desserts allure, tempt and then stab - from the front.
You see, the pastry-chef, the halwai, the lady of the house all do it purposely out of the goodness of their hearts, to save humanity from obesity, diabetes and heart disease! 
(The author, a lady of the house herself may not necessarily subscribe to this line of thought but must issue it out of social health obligations, blah and bleh legal by-laws, and commendable consideration towards bad pastry chefs and their clan.)



You could read some more of my food-ravings here:

1) Common-place Curd-Rice
2) Ghar ki murgi daal barabar?
3) Sweet Temptations
4) Athithi Devo Bhavah, anybody?
5) Kaapi-Ready
6) Idli Seria Vanduda
7) Sweet Betrayals



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