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Friday 19 July 2019

The Not-So-Polite Observations of an Old Sour Grape

Hey there! If you are a blogger friend, I heartily congratulate you for having made it to The List. Non-bloggers (is there a muggle-like word for them?), it is a big thing to be on The List if you are a blogger. It is a comprehensive list, kinda like the Yellow Pages Awards for bloggers. Every blogger worth his words will be on The List. 

Every once in a while (probably every two months?), I am pleasantly surprised to see updates upon updates from delighted bloggers of having made it to The List. It is most likely that it is every blogger's dream to be acknowledged, to make a difference with words and thoughts that reach across the globe, enlightening, entertaining, healing the world with his/her prowess and knowledge.

I hasten to visit The Site, every time it comes up, and scroll down to the R's. R...Ra..tensing as I arrive at Re...nope, not there. Oh, yes, yours truly and blog are not on The List, as usual. Well, what did you expect, I say to myself. Writing whimsical stuff when it catches your fancy that caters to no one in particular, goes by a punchline that says, Always Expect the Unexpected, and you expect to be on The List? Pah! So not happening!
Are you even a blogger if you are not on The List, I ask myself. Yes, existential questions and self-doubt rack the mind. 

I casually wonder at the ingenuity of the person compiling The List. Smart guy/gal, this one. I hear listicle is a favorite blogging tool to help generate good SEO. (Look Ma, I am even learning to use some tech jargon in my blog)
This guy generates these listicles much like the honors list or the report cards one used to get in those harrowing wonder years. There are categories of these listicles, and pretty exhaustive lists these are. Besides the Top 25 Blogs, Top Travel Blogs, Top Food Blogs, Top Personal Blogs, there are other lists as well. Well-meaning, all-inclusive Lists like 1st, 2nd, 3rd consolation prizes, everyone gets to be on a List. In fact, it requires a special kind of talent to not make it to The List. Ahem! I surmise, I have not lost my touch in this aspect - consistently not making it to any list that matters.

The ones on The List definitely form the happening crowd of bloggers - some veteran reknown names, some consistent players, some newbie bloggers, some who've entered blogosphere from the happening Instagramland, to conquer this third-world SM realm. Yes, it does have the creme de la creme of bloggers. 
Blogging is much like Bollywood. You need to keep at it consistently. Be seen everywhere. Create controversies. Hob-nob with the hob-nobbable ones. Oh, yes generate content too.

And then I think...what if in the next Season of Listings, my blog makes it to The List? What then? Won't I be doing everything I could to tom-tom the breaking news, shouting it off roof-tops, nay, SM timelines? That ethereal moment in the limelight, however feeble its light, is what drives every being to chase his dream. Maybe I'd go that way too. 
Then again, I could demur! Be like the hoity-toity Amir Khan type or the award-waapsi type, and not do it very quietly either. I'd head to the SM and nonchalantly disclaim my claim to fame - that should make for some desirable noise - ruffling feathers.

Speaking of ruffling feathers, I think this post is certainly going to make inroads on that aspect.
Meh! I am just a good ol' sour grape! 


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