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Monday 11 July 2016

Bill please - Boss play

'Oye, pappe! Bill itthe le aa!' bawled Sherry in between burps and generously running his palms around his overfull paunch! 'Nahi,, no, no paaji! This time it will be my honor to footing the bill, I say!' stepped in Mishra. 'Na bhai na, ye bill toh maro che!' jumped in Jignesh! Soon the other male members of the party, trooped in to demand their right, to foot the bill. Miss Cheryl and Mrs Patil who had been demurely sitting, started feeling rather left out from all the action. What the heck! Appraisals happen only once a year, no point in missing a single opportunity, is there? And so, they joined the melee!
Mr Shekhar was completely bewildered at the show of such fire and passion from his erstwhile subdued and courteous staff. Never before had he heard the coy Mishra be so vociferous or the timid Miss Cheryl being so aggressive!
But matters were rapidly progressing towards a potential battle with the waiter nervously holding the bill high over his head while standing on top of a chair!
Shekhar cleared his voice rather loudly, but of course it was drowned in all the cacophony! He waved like crazy, but so fierce was the concentration of all involved in claiming the bill, that they paid little heed to other distractions. 
Only one way to get their attention - Shekhar ran to grab an empty chair and now climbed from there to the adjoining table! All the other customers and staff who had been avidly watching the fanfare surrounding the waiter with the bill on the chair, now shifted their attention to the suited-booted gentleman towering at an even more elevated level! 
Eventually the staffers noticed the strange apparition of their boss on the table too and the brawl subsided to a hush.
'I am glad, you have all finally decided to heed me,' started Shekhar. 'Please stop this nonsense, the bill goes into company account so there is absolutely no need for anyone to foot it!' The relieved waiter started clapping and soon the rest of the restaurant followed suit. 
Hurriedly the staff raced each other to be the first to rescue the boss from the higher altitude to normal plains. Shekhar chuckled, "Gupta, I think it's high time you wore a toupee!
Well guys, thank you all for a fantastic time and now that you are all settled and quiet, I have an announcement to is my last day in this office, ten glorious years with this wonderful organization. I am confident that my successor will be equally supportive, don't worry! Your appraisals will be handled by the new boss as I need to join my new firm ASAP!
Thanks for being a wonderful team and thanks for a lovely lunch. Ha,ha, ha, big surprise right? Oh and yes! I was kidding about the bill going into company account! Go ahead now and decide peacefully as to who will settle it. I need to hurry; there's a welcome party being hosted in my honor at my new office! Cheers team! "

Me-Me, anybody?

Do join me again as I unravel the next episode in the Bill please series!

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

2. Bill Please - Boss Play
3. Bill Please - To good ol' times

A quick recap from the previous post:

I have managed to segregate people into six categories based on their distinctive reactions upon sighting the bill. I also hasten to add that one cannot be indefinitely slotted into a particular category, after all human reactions vary according to situations, don’t they?

Firstly we have the Me-Me or the large-hearted guys. A brouhaha ensues between this dwindling race of individuals, who get their kicks by way of footing the bill. Typically there will two or more contestants vying for the check in this scene. The contestants may even get a little heated on this issue, especially if the participants of the meal include the boss or the prospective girlfriend. 
While the victor proudly settles the bill, the loser good-naturedly back slaps him, ruing his loss and promising that the next victory would be his! You might not want to miss the loser's rare smug smile masked beneath the defeated look!
It’s beside the point, but still these victors may not always continue to vie for that spotespecially after a verbal beat-down from over-zealous better-halves/girlfriends/mommies. ‘Why did YOU have to? Were YOU the only one that ate? Aren’t YOU the most generous one?’ And a good dose of such reprisals ensure that repeat gestures of magnanimity are curbed!

A sub-category in the Me-Me group includes persons who Me-Me to the fore and then lose ground when they knowingly or unknowingly realize that their wallets/credit cards are stretched! It is the thought that counts, right?

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